Ferris Bueller's Day Off

00:00:17lt is a beautiful day in Chicago today.
00:00:20Temperatures expected to reach the upper 70s.
00:00:23Right now, 75 at the lakefront,
00:00:2574 at Midway, 73 at O'Hare.
00:00:28And now, up in the sky,
00:00:31-Don NeIson with SkyView traffic. -Ferris?
00:00:33-Thanks. We've got scores of accidents. -Ferris?
00:00:35Tom!
00:00:39-What's the matter? -lt's Ferris.
00:00:41-What? What's wrong? -What's wrong? For Christ's sake
00:00:43look at him, honey.
00:00:46Ferris?
00:00:50He doesn't have a fever, but he says his stomach hurts and he's seeing spots.
00:00:54What's the matter, Ferris?
00:00:57Papa?
00:00:59Honey, feel his hands. They're cold and clammy.
00:01:06l'm fine.
00:01:08-l can get up. -No.
00:01:11-l have a test today. -No.
00:01:12You...
00:01:14l have to take it.
00:01:17l want to go to a good college, so l can have a fruitful life.
00:01:20Honey, you're not going to school like this, now.
00:01:23Fine. What's this? What's his problem?
00:01:27-He doesn't feel well. -Yeah, right.
00:01:29Dry that one out, you can fertilize the lawn.
00:01:32Jeanie? ls that you?
00:01:36Jeanie? l can't see that far.
00:01:39Jeanie? Jeanie, l...
00:01:46-Bite the big one, Junior. -Thank you, Jeanie. You get to school.
00:01:49Wait, you're letting him stay home?
00:01:52l can't believe this. lf l was bleeding out my eyes
00:01:54you guys would make me go to school. This is so unfair.
00:01:57Jeanie, please don't be upset with me.
00:02:00You have your health. Be thankful.
00:02:07That's it. l want out of this family.
00:02:12l'm okay. l'll just sleep.
00:02:16Maybe l'll have an aspirin around noon.
00:02:18Now, listen, l'm showing some houses to that,
00:02:21that family from Vermont today. So l'll be in the area.
00:02:24Now, my office will know just where l am if you need me, okay?
00:02:28-Okay. -Okay.
00:02:29l'll check on you too, pal.
00:02:31lt's nice to know that l have such loving, caring parents.
00:02:36You're both very special people.
00:02:43Now, you get better, pumpkin.
00:02:46Okay, pumpkin.
00:02:49l'll be home at 6:00 sharp.
00:02:50lf you need anything, call.
00:02:53Ringy-dingy.
00:02:58-We love you, sweetie. -l love you, too.
00:03:04Call if you need us.
00:03:14They bought it.
00:03:26lncredible.
00:03:27One of the worst performances of my career
00:03:29and they never doubted it for a second.
00:03:37How could l possibly be expected to handle school on a day like this?
00:03:51This is my ninth sick day this semester.
00:03:53lt's getting pretty tough coming up with new illnesses.
00:03:57lf l go for 10, l'm probably gonna have to barf up a lung.
00:04:00So l better make this one count.
00:04:04The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands.
00:04:08lt's a good non-specific symptom. l'm a big believer in it.
00:04:12A lot of people will tell you that a good, phony fever is a dead lock.
00:04:16But, you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office.
00:04:21That's worse than school.
00:04:24You fake a stomach cramp
00:04:26and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing,
00:04:29you lick your palms.
00:04:31lt's a little childish and stupid,
00:04:33but then, so is high school.
00:04:36Life moves pretty fast.
00:04:41lf you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
00:04:47l do have a test today. That wasn't bullshit.
00:04:51lt's on European socialism. l mean, really, what's the point?
00:04:55l'm not European. l don't plan on being European.
00:04:58So, who gives a crap if they're socialists?
00:05:00They could be fascist anarchists.
00:05:02lt still wouldn't change the fact that l don't own a car.
00:05:24lt's not that l condone fascism
00:05:26or any "ism," for that matter.
00:05:28"lsms," in my opinion, are not good.
00:05:30A person should not believe in an "ism," he should believe in himself.
00:05:34l quote John Lennon, "l don't believe in Beatles, l just believe in me."
00:05:39A good point there. After all, he was "The Walrus."
00:05:43l could be "The Walrus." l'd still have to bum rides off of people.
00:05:48-Adams? -Here.
00:05:50-Adamley? -Here.
00:05:52Adamowsky?
00:05:54-Adamson? -Here.
00:05:56-Adler? -Here.
00:05:59Anderson?
00:06:01-Anderson? -Here.
00:06:04Bueller?
00:06:12-Bueller? -He's sick.
00:06:16My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend
00:06:18heard from this guy who knows this kid, who's going
00:06:21with a girl who saw Ferris pass out at Thirty-One Flavors last night.
00:06:24l guess it's pretty serious.
00:06:27-Thank you, Simone. -No problem whatsoever.
00:06:30Frye? Frye?
00:06:35Frye?
00:06:45Hello?
00:06:47-Cameron, babe, what's happening? -Very little.
00:06:51-How do you feel? -Shredded.
00:06:55ls your mother in the room?
00:06:58She's in Decatur. Unfortunately, she's not staying.
00:07:03Where are you?
00:07:04l'm taking the day off. Now get dressed and come on over.
00:07:08l can't, stupid, l'm sick.
00:07:11That's all in your head.
00:07:12Come on over.
00:07:13l feel like complete shit, Ferris. l can't go anywhere.
00:07:17l'm sorry to hear that. Now come on over here and pick me up.
00:07:31l'm dying.
00:07:38You're not dying. You just can't think of anything good to do.
00:07:46lf anybody needs a day off, it's Cameron.
00:07:49He has a lot of things to sort out before he graduates.
00:07:52He can't be wound up this tight and go to college.
00:07:54His roommate will kill him.
00:07:56When Cameron was in Egypt's land
00:08:02Let my Cameron go
00:08:08Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight
00:08:10that if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass,
00:08:13in two weeks you'd have a diamond.
00:08:21Katie Bueller.
00:08:22This is Edward R. Rooney, Dean of Students.
00:08:25Oh, my God. l'm so sorry.
00:08:30l just completely forgot to call.
00:08:32Then you are aware that your son is not in school today?
00:08:35Yes, l am. Ferris is home, sick.
00:08:38Now, l had a meeting first thing this morning.
00:08:39l know l should have called, it just completely slipped my mind.
00:08:42l'm really very sorry.
00:08:44Are you also aware, Mrs. Bueller, that
00:08:47Ferris does not have what we consider to be
00:08:49an exemplary attendance record?
00:08:52l don't understand.
00:08:54He has missed an unacceptable number of school days.
00:08:57ln the opinion of this educator,
00:08:59Ferris is not taking his academic growth seriously.
00:09:02Now, l've spent my morning examining his records.
00:09:07lf Ferris thinks that he can just coast through this month
00:09:10and still graduate, he is sorely mistaken.
00:09:14l have no reservation, whatsoever,
00:09:17about holding him back another year.
00:09:22-This is all news to me. -Usually is.
00:09:26So far this semester he has been absent nine times.
00:09:31-Nine times? -Nine times.
00:09:35l don't remember him being sick nine times.
00:09:38That's probably because he wasn't sick, he was skipping school.
00:09:43Wake up and smell the coffee, Mrs. Bueller.
00:09:45lt's a fool's paradise.
00:09:47He is just leading you down the primrose path.
00:09:50l can't believe it.
00:09:51l've got it right here in front of me.
00:09:54He has missed nine days.
00:10:05l asked for a car, l got a computer.
00:10:07How's that for being born under a bad sign?
00:10:11Grace?
00:10:15Grace!
00:10:17Look, l can give you every assurance, Mr. Rooney, that Ferris is home
00:10:20and he is very ill.
00:10:22ln fact, l debated whether or not l should even leave him.
00:10:24Grace!
00:10:26l can appreciate how this time of year children are prone to taking the day off.
00:10:29However, in Ferris' case, l can assure you, he is truly a very sick boy.
00:10:40Never had one lesson.
00:10:44ln 1930,
00:10:46the Republican-controlled House of Representatives,
00:10:49in an effort to alleviate the effects of the...
00:10:52Anyone? Anyone? The Great Depression,
00:10:56passed the... Anyone? Anyone?
00:11:00The tariff bill, the Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act which...
00:11:06Anyone? Raised or lowered?
00:11:08Raised tariffs
00:11:10in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government.
00:11:14Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects?
00:11:18lt did not work and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression.
00:11:23Today, we have a similar debate over this.
00:11:25Anyone know what this is? Class? Anyone?
00:11:29Anyone?
00:11:30Anyone seen this before?
00:11:32The Laffer Curve. Anyone know what this says?
00:11:35lt says, that at this point on the revenue curve,
00:11:40you will get exactly the same amount of revenue
00:11:43as at this point.
00:11:45This is very controversial.
00:11:46Does anyone know what Vice President Bush called this in 1980?
00:11:51Anyone?
00:11:53Something "d-o-o" economics.
00:11:56Voodoo economics.
00:12:09Jeanie.
00:12:11l'm really sorry about your brother.
00:12:13What are you sorry for? l have to live with the trouser snake.
00:12:16No, l mean, l heard he's really sick.
00:12:18Whoa. Whoa. Who said he's sick?
00:12:20A whole bunch of people. They said he's like on the verge of death.
00:12:24This guy in my biology class
00:12:26said that if Ferris dies, he's giving his eyes to Stevie Wonder.
00:12:31He's such a sweetie. Got to go.
00:12:34-Hi, Jeanie. -Shut up.
00:12:37Please, do not yank my cord on this. How desperate is the situation?
00:12:41Well, did you see Alien?
00:12:44When that creature was in that guy's stomach?
00:12:48lt kind of feels like that.
00:12:50Freshmen.
00:12:51Goddamn, are you kidding?
00:12:53No, of course l'm not kidding. Do l sound like l'm kidding?
00:12:56Who's he talking to?
00:12:57Ferris Bueller, do you know him?
00:12:59Yeah. He's getting me out of summer school.
00:13:00We appreciate you letting us know how you're doing.
00:13:03We've got to buzz. Keep a good thought, dude.
00:13:04Thanks.
00:13:07Shit. l hope he doesn't die.
00:13:09l can't handle summer school.
00:13:10-Wait a minute, give me somebody else. -Yeah, sure, hold on.
00:13:15-You see Alien? -Yeah, why?
00:13:21-Hello? -Hi.
00:13:23Hi, Ferris, how's your bod?
00:13:26Oh, my God, you're dying?
00:13:33-ls it serious? -l don't know. l hope not.
00:13:36-Think l may need a kidney transplant. -Shit.
00:13:41-Are you upset? -Excuse me.
00:13:44-Think you'll be alive this weekend? -Yeah, l'd say l will.
00:13:47Great. Maybe l'll see you. Bye.
00:14:05l don't trust this kid any further than l can throw him.
00:14:10Well, with your bad knee, Ed, you shouldn't throw anybody.
00:14:16lt's true.
00:14:17What is so dangerous about a character like Ferris Bueller is
00:14:21he gives good kids bad ideas.
00:14:23The last thing l need at this point in my career is
00:14:261,500 Ferris Bueller disciples running around these halls.
00:14:30He jeopardizes my ability to effectively govern this student body.
00:14:34Well, makes you look like an ass is what he does, Ed.
00:14:39Thank you, Grace. l think you're wrong.
00:14:41Well, he's very popular, Ed.
00:14:43The sportos and motorheads, geeks, sluts,
00:14:47bloods, wasteoids, dweebies, dickheads,
00:14:50they all adore him.
00:14:51They think he's a righteous dude.
00:14:56That is why l have got to catch him this time.
00:14:58To show these kids that the example he sets
00:15:01is a first-class ticket to nowhere.
00:15:05Ed.
00:15:06You sounded like Dirty Harry just then.
00:15:09Really?
00:15:16Thanks, Grace.
00:15:18l'm serious, man, this is ridiculous.
00:15:20Making me wait around the house for you.
00:15:22Why can't you let me rot in peace?
00:15:24Cameron, this is my ninth sick day.
00:15:26lf l get caught, l won't graduate.
00:15:28l'm not doing this for me, l'm doing it for you.
00:15:31-Do you know what my diastolic is? -Be a man.
00:15:34Take some Pepto-Bismol, get dressed, and come on over here.
00:15:37-l'm tired of this stuff. -Shut up.
00:15:40Hold your water for a second, l got another call.
00:15:45-Hello? -Ferris?
00:15:47Hi.
00:15:49You sound terrible.
00:15:51Really? Darn. l thought l was improving.
00:15:53Were you sleeping?
00:15:55Dad, can you hang on for a second?
00:15:58-Sure, pal. -Hang on.
00:16:00-Cameron, it's my dad. -Great.
00:16:04Keep me out of it.
00:16:05lf you're not over here in 15 minutes, you can find a new best friend.
00:16:09You've been saying that since the fifth grade.
00:16:13-Dad? -Yeah?
00:16:15All this talking has made me kind of light-headed.
00:16:18l think l ought to lie down.
00:16:20Take a hot bath and then wrap a hot towel around your head.
00:16:24-Wrap a hot towel around my head? -And then
00:16:27make yourself some soup. Get a nap. Okay?
00:16:30Okay.
00:16:31-Hey, Ferris? -Yeah?
00:16:33-Love you, pal. -l love you, too.
00:16:39l'm so disappointed in Cameron.
00:16:42$20 says he's sitting in his car, debating about whether or not he should go out.
00:16:49He'll keep calling me.
00:16:51He'll keep calling me until l come over.
00:16:53He'll make me feel guilty.
00:16:56This...
00:16:58This is ridiculous. Okay, l'll go, l'll go, l'll go.
00:17:02Shit.
00:17:10Goddamn it!
00:17:21Forget it. That's it.
00:17:26l'm not going.
00:17:43ln
00:17:47what way
00:17:52does the author's use
00:17:55of the prison
00:18:02symbolize
00:18:13the protagonist's struggle? And
00:18:17how does this relate
00:18:19to our discussion of the uses of irony?
00:18:25Mr. Knowlan, may l interrupt, please?
00:18:35Sloane Peterson?
00:18:38May l have a word with you, dear?
00:18:42My dear, l'm afraid that l'm the bearer of bad tidings.
00:18:47Your father called.
00:18:50Your grandmother has just passed.
00:18:54-No. -Oh, darling. Oh, honey.
00:19:01Dead grandmother?
00:19:03Yes, that's what Mr. Peterson said.
00:19:06l had Florence Sparrow notify Sloane. Poor little lamb.
00:19:10Who's this girl going out with?
00:19:12lt's so hard to tell these days.
00:19:15l do see her with Ferris Bueller quite a little bit.
00:19:20Would you get me Mr. Peterson's daytime number, please?
00:19:23Surely.
00:19:27-Ed Rooney's office. -This is George Peterson.
00:19:31Please hold.
00:19:33What do you know? lt's Mr. Peterson.
00:19:37You still want his daytime number?
00:19:44-Ed Rooney. -Ed. This is George Peterson.
00:19:48How are you today, sir?
00:19:49We've had a bit of bad luck this morning, as you may have heard.
00:19:53Yeah, l heard, and l'm all broken up.
00:19:56-Boy, what a blow. -Yeah. Yeah.
00:20:00Well, it's been a tough morning, and
00:20:02we've got a lot of family business to take care of. So
00:20:05if you wouldn't mind excusing Sloane, l'd appreciate it.
00:20:09Sure, l'd be happy to.
00:20:11Yeah, you just produce a corpse, and
00:20:15l'll release Sloane.
00:20:17l want to see this dead grandmother, firsthand.
00:20:20Ed?
00:20:21lt's all right, Grace. lt's Ferris Bueller, the little twerp.
00:20:25l'm gonna set the trap and let him fall right into it.
00:20:29Ed, l'm sorry, did you say you wanted to see a body?
00:20:33Yeah, that's right.
00:20:35Just roll her old bones on over here, and l'll dig up your daughter.
00:20:39-You know, that's school policy. -Oh?
00:20:41-Was this your mother? -No, my wife's mother.
00:20:47Ed Rooney's office.
00:20:49Hi, this is Ferris Bueller, can l speak to Mr. Rooney, please?
00:20:52Thank you.
00:20:56Hold.
00:20:59Tell you what, dip-shit,
00:21:01you don't like my policies you can just come on down here, and
00:21:05smooch my big old white butt.
00:21:08-Ed. -Pucker up, buttercup. What?
00:21:11Ferris Bueller's on line two.
00:21:24Hey, Mr. Rooney, how you doing?
00:21:26Listen, l'm sorry to disturb you at work, but l'm not feeling very well today
00:21:29and l was wondering if it might be possible for my sister to bring home
00:21:33any assignments from my classes that l might need.
00:21:36Have a nice day.
00:21:52Mr. Peterson?
00:21:55l think l owe you an apology, sir.
00:21:57-Well, l should say you do. -l...
00:22:01l, l, l...
00:22:02Well, l think you should be sorry, for Christ's sake.
00:22:05A family member dies
00:22:07and you insult me. What the hell is the matter with you anyway?
00:22:11Well...
00:22:13l really don't know, sir.
00:22:14l mean, l didn't think l was talking to you.
00:22:16l thought l was talking to somebody else.
00:22:18You know, sir, that l would never deliberately insult you like that. l...
00:22:21l can't begin to tell you how embarrassed l am.
00:22:25-What? -Pardon my French,
00:22:27but you're an asshole.
00:22:28-What do you want? -Asshole.
00:22:31Absolutely right, sir. You've hit the nail right on the head.
00:22:34Find out where she is.
00:22:36This isn't over yet, buster. Do you read me?
00:22:38Loud and clear, Mr. Peterson.
00:22:41Call me "sir," goddamn it!
00:22:43-Yes, sir, yes, sir. -That's better.
00:22:47And you just mind your p's and q's, buster.
00:22:50And remember who you're dealing with.
00:22:53Bueller, Ferris Bueller.
00:22:57Now, l'm a little scared 'cause what if he recognizes my voice?
00:23:00-lmpossible. You're doing great. -Yeah?
00:23:06She's in... Wait.
00:23:10Rooney!
00:23:14Rooney, calm down!
00:23:16Just a moment.
00:23:18Ed! Get in here!
00:23:22Just a little office difficulty, sir.
00:23:24Rooney, l don't have all day to bark at you.
00:23:26So l'm gonna make this short and sweet.
00:23:28lt's great. Perfect. l love it.
00:23:30l want my daughter out in front of the school in 10 minutes by herself.
00:23:34l don't want anybody... What?
00:23:36lt's too suspicious. He'll think something's up.
00:23:38-Cover it. -You.
00:23:39-Talk. -You.
00:23:41-Talk. -Come on.
00:23:43Talk. No.
00:23:45Rooney! Rooney.
00:23:47Yes, yes.
00:23:48Listen here, pay attention. l changed my mind.
00:23:52l want you out in front of the school with her.
00:23:53l'd like to have a few words with you, by God.
00:23:58On second thought, we don't have time to talk right now.
00:24:00We'll get together soon and we'll have lunch.
00:24:04What the hell is wrong with you?
00:24:07Wait.
00:24:08-Where's your brain? -Why'd you kick me?
00:24:11-Where's your brain? -l asked you first.
00:24:15How can we pick up Sloane if Rooney is there with her?
00:24:20l said for her to be there alone and you freaked.
00:24:27Now, l didn't... l didn't hit you. l lightly slapped you.
00:24:30You hit me.
00:24:35Look, don't ask me to participate in your stupid crap
00:24:38if you don't like the way l do it.
00:24:42You make me get out of bed. You make me come over here.
00:24:45You make me make a phony phone call to Edward Rooney?
00:24:50The man could squash my nuts into oblivion, and then,
00:24:53and then, you deliberately hurt my feelings.
00:24:56No, l did not deliberately... l didn't deliberately hurt your feelings.
00:24:59-Really? -Really, no. No, l didn't.
00:25:05What are you doing?
00:25:06See you later, pal, l'm going home.
00:25:08-No, no, come on, don't do that. -Have a nice life.
00:25:11Cameron, wait a minute. Cameron, come back.
00:25:14l didn't mean to lose my temper. l'm sorry. lt was uncalled for.
00:25:19-You serious? -Yeah.
00:25:29Here you go.
00:25:33Thank you.
00:25:36You did screw up, though, right?
00:25:42l mean, not that it was completely your fault.
00:25:46-Why? -Well,
00:25:49to fix the situation
00:25:52l'm gonna have to ask you for a small favor.
00:26:11The 1961 Ferrari 250 GT California.
00:26:20Less than 100 were made.
00:26:23My father spent three years restoring this car.
00:26:27lt is his love, it is his passion...
00:26:30lt is his fault he didn't lock the garage.
00:26:36Ferris, what are you talking about?
00:26:42Ferris, my father loves this car more than life itself.
00:26:45A man with priorities so far out of whack doesn't deserve such a fine automobile.
00:26:51No. No.
00:26:54-Apparently you don't understand. -Wow.
00:26:57Ferris, he never drives it.
00:27:00He just rubs it with a diaper.
00:27:03Hey, remember how insane he went when l broke my retainer?
00:27:08Come on, that was a little piece of plastic, this is a Ferrari.
00:27:15Cameron, l'm sorry, but we can't pick up Sloane in your car.
00:27:19Mr. Rooney would never believe Mr. Peterson drives that piece of shit.
00:27:24-lt's not a piece of shit. -lt is a piece of shit.
00:27:27Don't worry about it, l don't even have a piece of shit, l have to envy yours.
00:27:31Thanks.
00:27:34Look, l'm sorry, there's nothing else we can do.
00:27:50-He knows the mileage, Ferris. -He doesn't trust you?
00:27:54-Never has, never will. -Look, this is real simple.
00:27:57Whatever miles we put on, we'll take off.
00:28:01-How? -We'll drive home backwards.
00:28:04No. No!
00:28:07Ferris, forget it. You're just gonna have to think of something else.
00:28:10l'm putting my foot down.
00:28:12How about we rent a nice Cadillac? My treat.
00:28:17We could call a limo!
00:28:20A nice stretch job with a TV and a bar.
00:28:23How about that?
00:28:28Come on, live a little.
00:28:34Once again, let me tell you how deeply saddened l am by your loss. l...
00:28:38l had a grandmother, once.
00:28:42Two, actually.
00:28:43Deficits. Who will have to pay that eventually? Anyone? Anyone know?
00:28:47"Man that is born of woman hath but a short time to live
00:28:50"and is full of misery
00:28:52"He cometh up and is cut down like a flow'r
00:28:56"He flee'th as if it were a shadow
00:28:58"and never continueth in one stay"
00:29:04Oh, dear.
00:29:10Between grief and nothing,
00:29:13l'll take grief.
00:29:16Great.
00:29:27Oh, Sloane, dear.
00:29:29Hurry along now.
00:29:33l guess that's my dad.
00:29:35-Yeah. -Gotta go.
00:29:40Mr. Rooney...
00:29:43-Ed, you're a beautiful man. -Thank you.
00:29:49l wanna thank you for your warmth and compassion.
00:29:54Higher "what" rates? Anyone?
00:29:57Higher marginal rates on your taxes. Any questions so far?
00:30:02Shit.
00:30:05-Hi. -Do you have a kiss for Daddy?
00:30:08Are you kidding?
00:30:20So, that's how it is in their family.
00:30:28-Hi, Cameron. You comfortable? -Hi, Sloane. No.
00:30:35What are we gonna do?
00:30:37The question isn't: What are we going to do?
00:30:40The question is: What aren't we going to do?
00:30:42Don't say we're not going to take the car home.
00:30:43Please don't say we're not going to take the car home.
00:30:46lf you had access to a car like this,
00:30:48would you take it back right away?
00:30:51Neither would l.
00:31:24Hey, Ferris, don't go so fast!
00:31:26-Red line, red line, red line. -Ferris, get out!
00:32:28Thank you.
00:32:29Save Ferris.
00:32:30God loves you, you're very generous.
00:32:32Save Ferris, save Ferris.
00:32:33Save Ferris Bueller. Save Ferris.
00:32:37-Save Ferris? -What?
00:32:39Well, see, we're collecting money to buy Ferris Bueller a new kidney
00:32:43and they run about $50,000, so if you could help out...
00:32:45-Go piss up a flagpole. -l'm sorry?
00:32:48-You should be. -Hey...
00:32:50Hey! Hey...
00:32:51What if you need a favor someday
00:32:53from Ferris Bueller? Then where will you be, huh?
00:32:55You heartless wench.
00:32:57Peterson home on line one.
00:32:59-And watch your mouth this time. -Go soak your head.
00:33:05We can't come to the phone right now.
00:33:08We've had a death in the family.
00:33:12Grace,
00:33:14Ferris Bueller's behind this. There is no doubt in my mind.
00:33:17And now he's got Sloane Peterson involved in this thing.
00:33:19Her grandmother, too.
00:33:23You pinhead.
00:33:24lf you need to reach us we'll be at the following number.
00:33:34Okay.
00:33:36l did not achieve this position in life by having some snot-nosed punk
00:33:39leave my cheese out in the wind.
00:33:41You have reached the Coughlin Brothers Mortuary.
00:33:44We are deeply sorry we are unable to come to the phone right now,
00:33:47but if you leave your name and number,
00:33:48we'll get back to you as soon as is humanly possible.
00:33:56Something's going on, goddamn it.
00:33:59And l'm gonna find out what it is.
00:34:01l'm gonna catch this kid and l'm gonna put one hell of a dent in his future.
00:34:06Fifteen years from now when he looks back on the ruin his life's become,
00:34:11he is going to remember Edward Rooney.
00:34:35-Wrong. -What?
00:34:37Not here.
00:34:40We're not leaving the car here.
00:34:42-Why not? -Because we're not.
00:34:44l want the car back home where it belongs, right now.
00:34:46Come on, let's go.
00:34:47Cameron, what's gonna happen to it? lt's in a garage.
00:34:50lt could get wrecked, stolen, scratched,
00:34:54breathed on wrong, a pigeon could shit on it. Who knows?
00:34:57Listen, will you calm down, please?
00:34:59l'm gonna give the guy $5 to watch it.
00:35:02What guy?
00:35:10Hey, how you doing?
00:35:13Do you speak English?
00:35:16What country do you think this is?
00:35:20Okay. Listen,
00:35:21l want you to take extra special care of this vehicle. Okay?
00:35:25-Hey, no problem. -Great.
00:35:27Trust me.
00:35:30-Sir? -Come on.
00:35:32Come.
00:35:44Relax.
00:35:52You fellows have nothing to worry about. l'm a professional.
00:35:57Professional what?
00:36:09See what a finski can do to a guy's attitude?
00:36:13Cameron, come on.
00:36:15Come on, come on.
00:36:28Paper?
00:36:32Hey, look at that.
00:36:43Go! Go!
00:37:32Bless his little heart.
00:37:46Nine times.
00:38:33-Ferris, you think the car's all right? -Sure.
00:38:35This is the world's tallest building.
00:38:37Ferris, l don't feel too good. Can we leave soon?
00:38:401,353 feet up in the air...
00:38:43Here, climb up on this.
00:38:47Come on, everybody.
00:38:49Cameron.
00:38:51Okay, now
00:38:53lean forward against the glass like this.
00:38:59Oh, my God.
00:39:00lsn't that great?
00:39:03The city looks so peaceful from up here.
00:39:06Anything is peaceful from 1,353 feet.
00:39:11l think l see my dad.
00:39:15We got a lot to do, let's go.
00:39:17Shit.
00:39:20The son of a bitch is down there somewhere.
00:39:44-You want to get married? -Sure.
00:39:48Today?
00:39:51l'm serious.
00:39:53-l'm not getting married. -Why not?
00:39:57What do you mean, "Why not?" Think about it.
00:40:00Well, no, besides being too young,
00:40:02having no place to live,
00:40:05you feeling a little awkward about being the only cheerleader with a husband,
00:40:09give me one good reason why not.
00:40:11l'll give you two good reasons why not: my mother and my father.
00:40:16They're married and they hate each other.
00:40:17You've seen them. Am l right?
00:40:19-So what? -Well, it's like that car.
00:40:21He loves the car. He hates his wife.
00:40:33Thank you.
00:40:50Can we please get the hell out of here?
00:40:53This place gives me the creeps.
00:40:56Why didn't you tell me we were coming to a...
00:41:01-Hello, may l help you? -You can sure as hell try.
00:41:04Hi. l'm Abe Froman.
00:41:06Party of three for 12:00.
00:41:12ls there a problem?
00:41:14-You are Abe Froman? -That's right. l'm Abe Froman.
00:41:17The sausage king of Chicago?
00:41:21Yeah. That's me.
00:41:23Listen, young man,
00:41:24entre nous, l'm very busy here.
00:41:26Why don't you take the kids and go back to the clubhouse?
00:41:32Are you suggesting that l'm not who l say l am?
00:41:34l'm suggesting that you leave before l have to get snooty.
00:41:38-Snooty? -Snotty.
00:41:39-Snotty? -Okay, Abe, let's go.
00:41:42No, l'm not going anywhere. No, we'd like to be seated.
00:41:46Listen, young man, either you take the field trip outside
00:41:49or l'm going to have to call the police.
00:41:51The...
00:41:53-You're gonna call the police on me? -Yes.
00:41:55Fine. As a matter of fact, l'll call them myself.
00:41:58Yes. Call the police.
00:42:03This'll be a hoot.
00:42:11Here, give me the phone. l have another call.
00:42:13-No. -l've had enough of this horsing around.
00:42:15-Give me the phone back. -You touch me, l yell, "Rat."
00:42:18There's another phone around here somewhere. Find it.
00:42:20Wonderful.
00:42:24l weep for the future.
00:42:30Okay, Ferris, can we just let it go, please?
00:42:32Ferris, please. You've gone too far. You're gonna get busted.
00:42:38A: You can never go too far.
00:42:40B: lf l'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by a guy like that.
00:42:44Come on, "Abe."
00:42:47Ask for Abe Froman.
00:42:48-Chez Quis, bonjour. -May l speak to Abe Froman,
00:42:52-the sausage king of Chicago? -Abe Froman?
00:42:56Let me check the restaurant.
00:42:59Could you describe him for me, please?
00:43:02Leather jacket, white T-shirt, sweater vest.
00:43:07He's devastatingly handsome.
00:43:10-Hold on one moment. -Yes, thank you.
00:43:24Mr. Froman, this is Sergeant Peterson, Chicago Police.
00:43:32-l appreciate your understanding. -Don't think twice.
00:43:36lt's understanding that makes it possible
00:43:39for people like us to tolerate a person like yourself.
00:43:45-Thank you. -Don't mention it.
00:43:51Enjoy your lunch.
00:43:55Darling, you were wonderful.
00:44:07Cameron, dear friend,
00:44:10you thought we wouldn't have any fun. Shame on you.
00:44:19Maybe l'm overreacting.
00:44:21Maybe Ferris isn't such a bad guy.
00:44:24After all, l got a car. He got a computer.
00:44:28But still,
00:44:30why should he get to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants?
00:44:35Why should everything work out for him?
00:44:38What makes him so goddamn special?
00:44:42Screw him.
00:44:43l used to think that my family was the only one that had weirdness in it.
00:44:48That used to worry me.
00:44:50Then l saw how Cameron's family functioned.
00:44:53His home life is really twisted.
00:44:56That's why he's sick all the time. lt really bothers him.
00:45:00He's the only guy l know who feels better when he's sick.
00:45:04lf l had to live in that house, l'd probably pray for disease, too.
00:45:09The place is like a museum.
00:45:11lt's very beautiful and very cold
00:45:14and you're not allowed to touch anything.
00:45:17Can you appreciate what it must have been like
00:45:20for Cameron to be in that joint as a baby?
00:45:24l'm actually amazed that l got the car out of the garage.
00:45:28l caught Cameron digging the ride once or twice.
00:45:31lt's good for him.
00:45:33lt teaches him to deal with his fear.
00:45:37Plus, and l must be honest here,
00:45:40l love driving it. lt is so choice.
00:45:44lf you have the means, l highly recommend picking one up.
00:45:49-Thank you. -Yes, sir.
00:45:51Mint.
00:46:04Well, hello, Jeanie. Who's bothering you now?
00:46:07ls Mr. Rooney in?
00:46:08No, l'm sorry, he's not. Can l help you?
00:46:11l seriously doubt it. When's he back?
00:46:13l don't know.
00:46:15He's left the school grounds on personal business.
00:46:18What's that supposed to mean?
00:46:20l suppose it means it's personal and it's none of your business, young lady.
00:46:25Nice attitude.
00:46:27lsn't Mrs. Hagel expecting you in consumer ed. class?
00:46:30Probably.
00:46:38What a little asshole.
00:46:40Dave, you've got to consider raising your advertising budget.
00:46:43-We don't have the money. -Dave,
00:46:45if you wanna sell, you have to spend. lt's as simple as that.
00:46:50Four thousand restaurants in the downtown area.
00:46:52l pick the one my father goes to.
00:46:54-We're pinched, for sure. -No way, Cameron.
00:46:57Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive.
00:46:59Let's go.
00:47:01-Let's surrender. -Never.
00:47:09Dave, l know it sounds like l'm beating a dead horse on this one.
00:47:11But l'm telling you, that that's not the case.
00:47:13We don't have the money. We don't have the...
00:47:15Dave, you're one of the brightest guys in this business.
00:47:17You know what it takes to push this over the top.
00:47:20We're gonna go heavy on TV
00:47:22and lighten up on the radio and the print. Okay?
00:47:24-He's got the money. -Look, come on back to my office.
00:47:26-l'll lay out the entire... -He's got the money.
00:47:28Dave, we know you've got the money.
00:47:30We just have to spend it. That's all, you bonehead.
00:48:27Bueller.
00:48:40Les jeux sont faits. Translation: The game is up.
00:48:46Your ass is mine.
00:49:16Runner at first base, nobody out.
00:49:19That's the first hit they've had since the fifth inning,
00:49:23only the fourth hit in the game.
00:49:280 and 2, the count.
00:49:31There's a drive,
00:49:32left field, twisting, and into foul territory.
00:49:38Boy, l'm really surprised they didn't go for it in that inning.
00:49:41Lee Smith.
00:49:44-What's the score? -Nothing, nothing.
00:49:47Who's winning?
00:49:50The Bears.
00:49:51There's the ball, bunted foul back to the screen.
00:49:55Boy, l don't know...
00:50:06Think l broke my thumb.
00:50:07Hey batter, batter, batter, batter, batter, swing, batter. Come on.
00:50:11Hey, batter, batter, batter, batter, swing, batter.
00:50:15He can't hit, he can't hit, he can't hit, swing, batter.
00:50:23Hey, Cameron.
00:50:25Do you realize if we played by the rules, right now we'd be in gym?
00:50:30Keep moving, keep moving.
00:50:33You're up now.
00:50:34Come on, get the piano off that back. Let's go.
00:50:37Come on, boys, let's go.
00:50:40You'll never get out of here. Move!
00:50:45Come on, move!
00:50:52l hate him.
00:51:35Who is it?
00:51:43lt's Ed Rooney, Ferris. l'd like to have a word with you.
00:51:47Oh, l'm sorry. l can't come to the door right now.
00:51:50l'm afraid that in my weakened condition,
00:51:52l could take a nasty spill down the stairs and subject myself
00:51:55to further school absences.
00:51:58Save it, Ferris. Come down here.
00:52:00You can reach my parents at their places of business.
00:52:03Thank you for stopping by.
00:52:05l appreciate your concern for my well-being.
00:52:08l am not leaving till you come down and talk to me, Ferris.
00:52:12Have a nice day.
00:52:13You're in big trouble, buster!
00:52:15Get down here!
00:52:19Ferris.
00:52:21Ferris!
00:52:33Who is it?
00:52:34You know goddamn well who it is!
00:52:36Oh, l'm sorry. l can't come to the door right now.
00:52:40l'm afraid that in my weakened condition,
00:52:42l could take a nasty spill down the stairs and subject myself
00:52:45to further school absences.
00:52:48You can reach my parents at their places of business.
00:52:55Thank you for stopping by.
00:52:57l appreciate your concern for my well-being.
00:53:00Have a nice day.
00:53:14Damn it.
00:53:23Oh, mud.
00:53:53Bueller, you son of a bitch.
00:54:05My shoe.
00:54:17Damn it.
00:54:22Oh, shit.
00:55:04Not sure about this family.
00:55:45Hi, doggie.
00:55:52Stay, boy.
00:55:55No, no. Stay. Stay.
00:55:59Sit.
00:56:04Heel. Stay.
00:58:05And passing the reviewing stand now,
00:58:09Silbernen Ritter Drum and Bugle Corps.
00:58:13The United German-American Male and Female Caucus.
00:58:18The Empire German-Americans.
00:58:28lt's getting late, buddy, we better go get the car back home.
00:58:30-What? -What do you...
00:58:32We have a few hours. We have until 6:00.
00:58:34l'm sorry, l mean, l know you don't care, but it does mean my ass.
00:58:37-You think l don't care? -l know you don't care.
00:58:42Oh, that hurts, Cameron.
00:58:45-Cameron, what have you seen today? -Nothing good.
00:58:50Nothing...
00:58:51Nothing good? This...
00:58:54What do you mean, "Nothing good"? We've seen everything good!
00:58:57We've seen the whole city!
00:58:59We went to a museum, we saw priceless works of art.
00:59:02We ate pancreas.
00:59:05Saw... What?
00:59:07What's wrong?
00:59:16Look over there.
00:59:50What's he doing?
00:59:52He's licking the glass and making obscene gestures with his hands.
00:59:55What?
01:00:05Don't! Don't.
01:00:34He didn't leave. He's probably doing something.
01:00:36No, it really busts my hump, you know?
01:00:39Oh, Cameron, he didn't ditch us or anything. He's here.
01:00:42For all we know, he went back to school.
01:00:44He would not go back to school.
01:00:46Yeah, he'd do it. He'd just do it just to make me sweat.
01:00:49No, he would not. Cameron, come on.
01:00:51Makes me mad.
01:00:52Ladies and gentlemen, you're such a wonderful crowd.
01:00:56We'd like to play a little tune for you.
01:00:57lt's one of my personal favorites
01:01:00and l'd like to dedicate it to a young man
01:01:02who doesn't think he's seen anything good today.
01:01:05Cameron Frye, this one's for you.
01:01:15-Ferris! Get off of the float! -What are you doing?
01:01:18Get off the float! l can't believe you.
01:01:21How'd you get up there? You're out of your mind!
01:02:01You know, as long as l've known him everything works for him.
01:02:04There's nothing he can't handle. l can't handle anything.
01:02:09School, parents, the future...
01:02:13Ferris can do anything.
01:02:18l don't know what l'm gonna do.
01:02:22-College. -Yeah. But to do what?
01:02:29What are you interested in?
01:02:34Nothing.
01:02:37Me neither.
01:02:46You're crazy!
01:02:50What do you think Ferris is gonna do?
01:02:54He's gonna be a fry cook at Venus.
01:05:54Christ.
01:06:03Poochie, poochie, poochie.
01:06:05Look what Uncle Ed has for you, you little fucker.
01:06:15Jeez.
01:06:24Sleep tight, pooch.
01:06:52l knew it!
01:07:04Well, where is she?
01:07:07Look, this is her daughter.
01:07:13Well, do you know where she is?
01:07:15Do you know when she'll be back?
01:07:18Do you know anything?
01:08:10Ferris.
01:08:11Bueller.
01:08:15-Ha! -Ya!
01:08:34You're psychotic. You are, man.
01:08:36You're out of your goddamn mind. l can't believe you did that.
01:08:39l can't believe you went on a goddamn parade float!
01:08:43Okay, okay, wait. No, okay, wait. Okay.
01:08:46"Yeah, yeah. This tune is one of my personal favorites."
01:08:50You're out of your mind.
01:08:51Do you realize how many people saw you?
01:08:53-You're nailed. -No, no.
01:08:55-You are. You're nailed. -You are.
01:08:56Who'd believe that l was in a parade? Who the hell am l?
01:08:59Besides, anybody who would nail me wouldn't go to a parade.
01:09:01-My mother would. -l'm not worried about your mother.
01:09:05That was so quick.
01:09:08Hey.
01:09:11This looks okay to me, Cameron.
01:09:13Looks great, let's roll.
01:09:16Here you go. Nice job. Thank you.
01:09:19You're a very generous individual. Come back anytime.
01:09:23-Right, okay. Watch the seat. -Thanks a lot.
01:09:26Sorry.
01:09:32-Have a good night. -Bye, you guys.
01:09:35-Yeah, see you later. -Later.
01:09:41Yeah, man, we gotta do this again.
01:09:47Look, this... This is not a phony phone call.
01:09:49There is an intruder, male, Caucasian, possibly armed,
01:09:53certainly weird, in my kitchen.
01:09:57Yeah, my, my... My name's Bueller.
01:10:01lt's real nice that you hope my brother's feeling better,
01:10:04but l'm in danger, okay? l am very cute.
01:10:06l am very alone. And l'm very protective of my body.
01:10:09l do not want it violated, or killed, all right?
01:10:12l need help!
01:10:14Speak-a de English?
01:10:17Dickhead.
01:10:29God.
01:10:32Excuse me.
01:10:33Whoever's in the house is still in the house,
01:10:35l'd like you to know that l've just called the police.
01:10:38So if you have any brains whatsoever,
01:10:39you'll get your ass out of my house real quick.
01:10:44l'd also like to add that l have my father's gun
01:10:46and a scorching case of herpes.
01:10:57Hey, wait, wait, wait. That's my car! l'll move it!
01:11:03He got my keys!
01:11:07You shithead!
01:11:20l feel pretty good.
01:11:21-Yeah? -l feel real good.
01:11:23Those guys... Those guys were nice, huh? At the garage.
01:11:26l was a little worried about them.
01:11:29Turned out good.
01:11:35Hey.
01:11:41-Cameron? -Yeah?
01:11:43How many miles did you say this thing had on it when we left?
01:11:48One hundred and twenty-six
01:11:49and halfway between three and four-tenths.
01:11:52Why?
01:11:55How many miles are on it now?
01:12:02Here's where Cameron goes berserk.
01:12:24Cameron. Are you okay? Cam?
01:12:28Cameron, cut that out.
01:12:33Who is it?
01:12:36Oh, l'm sorry. l can't come to the door right now.
01:12:39l'm afraid that in my weakened condition,
01:12:41l could take a nasty spill down the stairs and subject myself...
01:12:44God bless the police.
01:12:46l'm saved. Oh, thank you, God. Thank you, thank you. You are the best.
01:12:49Have a nice day.
01:12:51Thank...
01:12:52l heard that you were feeling ill.
01:12:56Headache, fever, and a chill.
01:12:59l came to help restore your pluck
01:13:03'cause l'm the nurse who likes to...
01:13:12This may very well be for real.
01:13:16l think Cameron might have blown a microchip or two.
01:13:19He's always been a little keyed up.
01:13:22All l wanted to do was give him a good day.
01:13:26We're gonna graduate in a couple of months and then
01:13:29we'll have the summer. He'll work and l'll work.
01:13:34We'll see each other at night and on the weekends.
01:13:37Then he'll go to one school and l'll go to another.
01:13:41Basically that will be it.
01:13:47Sloane's as big a problem.
01:13:50She still has another year of high school.
01:13:52How do l deal with that?
01:13:55l was serious when l said l would marry her.
01:13:58l would.
01:13:59Cameron? Cam?
01:14:03Can you hear me?
01:14:07Cameron?
01:14:09Blink if you understand me.
01:14:12Cameron has never been in love.
01:14:15At least nobody's ever been in love with him.
01:14:18lf things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays.
01:14:23And she's gonna treat him like shit
01:14:26because she will have given him what he has built up in his mind
01:14:30as the end-all, be-all of human existence.
01:14:34She won't respect him.
01:14:36'Cause you can't respect somebody who kisses your ass.
01:14:40Just doesn't work.
01:14:42Ferris. We better try something else.
01:14:45This isn't working.
01:14:52You feeling any better, Cameron?
01:14:57Cam, why don't you come in here? lt's really nice.
01:15:05Cameron, l could flip out real easy, too.
01:15:08lt's okay.
01:15:11Sooner or later everybody goes to the zoo.
01:15:20Maybe he's really sick.
01:15:23Maybe he isn't just torturing himself.
01:16:08Hey.
01:16:10Hey, hey.
01:16:12Hey, Cameron.
01:16:14Cam. Cameron, wake up!
01:16:16Come on, wake up. Hey, wake up.
01:16:19Oh, shit, Cameron, come on. Cameron!
01:16:21Come on, wake up!
01:16:23Hey.
01:16:28What is that?
01:16:29Ferris Bueller, you're my hero.
01:16:32-You're kidding? -Wow, that was pretty impressive, man.
01:16:36You bitch. Oh, you son of a bitch.
01:16:40Come on.
01:16:42Tarzan.
01:16:46Sheena!
01:17:14Drugs?
01:17:18Thank you, no. l'm straight.
01:17:21l meant, are you in here for drugs?
01:17:26-Why are you here? -Drugs.
01:17:29l don't know why l'm here.
01:17:31Why don't you go home?
01:17:34Why don't you put your thumb up your butt?
01:17:42You wear too much eye make-up.
01:17:49My sister wears too much.
01:17:51People think she's a whore.
01:17:59You don't wanna talk about your problem?
01:18:01-With you? Are you serious? -l'm serious.
01:18:05Blow yourself.
01:18:11All right, you wanna know what's wrong?
01:18:16l know what's wrong.
01:18:18l just wanna hear you say it.
01:18:20ln a nutshell, l hate my brother.
01:18:23-How's that? -That's cool.
01:18:25Did you blow him away or something?
01:18:29No, not yet.
01:18:33See, l went home to confirm that the shithead
01:18:35was ditching school and when l was there,
01:18:37a guy broke into the house.
01:18:39l called the cops and they picked me up for making a phony phone call.
01:18:43What do you care if your brother ditches school?
01:18:47Why should he get to ditch, when everybody else has to go?
01:18:50-You could ditch. -Yeah, l'd get caught.
01:18:55l see.
01:18:57So you're pissed off 'cause he ditches and doesn't get caught, is that it?
01:19:03-Basically. -Basically.
01:19:07Then your problem is you.
01:19:09-Excuse me? -Excuse you.
01:19:12You ought to spend a little more time dealing with yourself
01:19:15a little less time worrying about what your brother does.
01:19:18That's just an opinion.
01:19:21-What are you, a psychiatrist? -No.
01:19:23Then why don't you keep your opinions to yourself?
01:19:30There's somebody you should talk to.
01:19:37lf you say "Ferris Bueller," you lose a testicle.
01:19:41Oh, you know him?
01:19:51You know, that whole time l was just thinking things over.
01:19:56l was, like... l was, like, meditating.
01:20:03Then l sort of watched myself from inside.
01:20:08l realized it was ridiculous
01:20:12being afraid, worrying about everything,
01:20:16wishing l was dead. All that shit. l'm tired of it.
01:20:23lt's the best day of my life.
01:20:31l'm gonna miss you guys next year.
01:20:42Cameron? Can l ask you a question?
01:20:47Yeah.
01:20:51Did you see me change out of my clothes by the Jacuzzi?
01:20:57Did you?
01:21:00You saw me?
01:21:02l thought you were catatonic.
01:21:09That's okay.
01:21:12l'm not embarrassed.
01:21:16l better check on the car.
01:21:32Hey, Ferris!
01:21:35Yeah?
01:21:39The miles aren't coming off.
01:21:43The miles aren't coming off going in reverse.
01:21:52Well, l thought that might be a problem.
01:21:54Just have to crack open the odometer, roll it back by hand.
01:22:00No. Forget it.
01:22:03Forget it.
01:22:11l gotta take a stand.
01:22:17l'm bullshit.
01:22:22l put up with everything.
01:22:29My old man pushes me around.
01:22:35l never say anything!
01:22:42Well, he's not the problem. l'm the problem.
01:22:51l gotta take a stand.
01:22:56l gotta take a stand against him.
01:23:01l am not gonna sit on my ass
01:23:05as the events that affect me unfold to determine the course of my life.
01:23:08l'm gonna take a stand.
01:23:12l'm gonna defend it.
01:23:15Right or wrong, l'm gonna defend it.
01:23:29l'm so sick of his shit!
01:23:32l can't stand him, and l hate this goddamn car.
01:23:36Who do you love? Who do you love? You love a car.
01:23:39You son of a bitch.
01:24:05Shit.
01:24:09l dented the shit out of it.
01:24:15Good.
01:24:20My father will come home, he'll see what l did. l can't hide this.
01:24:27He'll come home, he'll see what l did. He'll have to deal with me.
01:24:32l don't care, l really don't.
01:24:35l'm just tired of being afraid.
01:24:45Hell with him.
01:24:50l can't wait to see the look on the bastard's face.
01:25:23What'd l do?
01:25:35-What'd l do? -You killed the car.
01:26:18Whoa.
01:26:22Holy shit.
01:26:38Cameron, it's my fault.
01:26:40l'll take the heat for it.
01:26:42We'll wait for your father to come home
01:26:43and when he gets here, l'll tell him that l did it.
01:26:45He hates me anyway.
01:26:53No. l'll take it.
01:26:56No, l'll take it.
01:26:57No. No, you don't want this much heat.
01:27:00l want it. lf l didn't want it,
01:27:01l wouldn't have let you take the car out this morning.
01:27:03l made you take the car this morning.
01:27:06l could've stopped you.
01:27:08lt is possible to stop Mr. Ferris Bueller, you know?
01:27:11No, l want it. l'm gonna take it. That's it.
01:27:15When Morris comes home,
01:27:18he and l'll just have a little chat.
01:27:22lt's cool.
01:27:24No, it's gonna be good.
01:27:28Thanks anyway.
01:27:39This is a shock to me.
01:27:40l mean, first of all, l don't know why she wasn't in school.
01:27:43And second of all, l just can't believe
01:27:45she came to you with this story about an intruder.
01:27:48Well, for whatever reason she did it, l think she's had a pretty good scare.
01:27:52Well, l really appreciate your calling me. Really.
01:27:55l can assure you that her father and l are going
01:27:57to have a long talk with her when we get home.
01:27:59Thank you so much.
01:28:01Oh, by the way, l hope your son is feeling better.
01:28:04l beg your pardon?
01:28:06Tell him all the guys at the station here are pulling for him.
01:28:10Oh, right.
01:28:20-Hi. -Don't "hi" me, young lady.
01:28:23-l wanna get out of here, now, all right? -Okay.
01:28:25No, now. Let's get out of here.
01:28:27-Okay. -Okay?
01:28:29-Yes. -Now.
01:28:30Fine.
01:28:31Okay.
01:28:37-She's a little hyper. -Yeah.
01:28:43Let's not ruin this with a lot of talk, all right? Okay?
01:28:49You didn't tell me your name.
01:28:52Well, it's Jean, but, a lot of guys call me Shauna.
01:28:58Okay, Jean.
01:29:00Cool.
01:29:02That's great.
01:29:05l'll see you, okay?
01:29:08Yeah.
01:29:12Jeanie, now!
01:29:14-Now! -Okay!
01:29:26l had a great time today.
01:29:28Yeah. lt was pretty cool.
01:29:33Do you... Do you think Cameron's gonna be okay?
01:29:36Oh, yeah.
01:29:38Yeah, sure. For the first time in his life.
01:29:40He's gonna be just fine.
01:29:51You knew what you were doing when you woke up this morning, didn't you?
01:29:55Me? No.
01:30:17Oh, shit. l have to go.
01:30:22-l'll call you tonight. -Okay.
01:30:29-l love you! -l love you, too!
01:30:33He's gonna marry me.
01:30:39Do you know what it's like to be pulled out of work
01:30:41to pick up your daughter at the police station?
01:30:44No, not really.
01:30:45Well, on top of everything else,
01:30:47l was about to close the damn deal with the Vermont people.
01:30:50l'm sorry.
01:30:54l was gonna take my commission and buy Ferris a car.
01:30:59Jeanie, what the hell are you doing? You trying to kill us?
01:31:03God, look at this mess.
01:31:05Paper all over the place. l'll never get this back in order.
01:31:15Jeanie!
01:31:26-Slow down! Now! Now! -l can't drive when you're yelling at me!
01:31:30Stop it!
01:32:01-Hi, how you doing? Ferris Bueller. -Hi.
01:33:32-No, don't get up. -Hey.
01:33:33Smells delicious.
01:33:36-Dinner's ready. -What?
01:33:37Who's that?
01:34:12-What's wrong? -Everything.
01:34:16l just picked up Jeanie at the police station.
01:34:20She got a speeding ticket, another speeding ticket
01:34:23and l lost the Vermont deal because of her.
01:34:25l think we should shoot her.
01:34:33Looking for this?
01:34:48l got you, Ferris.
01:34:49-How's Ferris? Let's go check on him. -Okay, honey. Yeah.
01:34:52How was your day?
01:34:55l have dreamed about this.
01:34:59This time, goddamn, you little bastard,
01:35:04l've got you right where l want you.
01:35:06Ferris, we're home.
01:35:10So,
01:35:13how would you feel about another year of high school?
01:35:18Under my close personal supervision.
01:35:24Hi.
01:35:27Thank God you're all right. You know, we've been worried sick about you.
01:35:36Thank you, Mr. Rooney, for driving him home.
01:35:39Now l want you to go upstairs and get in bed.
01:35:54Scoot!
01:35:57Can you imagine someone as sick as Ferris
01:35:59trying to walk home from the hospital?
01:36:03Oh, kids.
01:36:07By the way, Mr. Rooney, you left your wallet on the kitchen floor.
01:37:18Honey.
01:37:20-He's still awfully warm. -How do you feel?
01:37:25150% better. Thank you.
01:37:30Please,
01:37:31don't make me stay home again. l wanna go to school.
01:37:35l have to graduate in June. And l want...
01:37:40Ferris, you're sick.
01:37:42Now don't go pushing it and making yourself worse.
01:37:45-Maybe you're right, Dad. -l know l'm right, pal.
01:37:50How'd you get to be so sweet?
01:37:53Years of practice.
01:38:05Blanket.
01:38:17Get well.
01:38:20Come on.
01:38:24Listen, l'm going to get myself settled and l'll bring a hot cup of soup, okay?
01:38:39Yup.
01:38:40l said it before and l'll say it again.
01:38:43Life moves pretty fast.
01:38:45lf you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
01:39:00Four years of chasing this kid.
01:39:04Four years he has been making a fool of me.
01:39:18Hey, Mr. Rooney, what's going on?
01:39:24Did you get in a fight?
01:39:28Want a lift?
01:41:15l bet you never smelled a real school bus before.
01:41:33Gummy Bear?
01:41:36They've been in my pocket. They're real warm and soft.
01:42:27You're still here?
01:42:31lt's over.
01:42:34Go home.
01:42:40Go.

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